Want a property in goa to your own design?

Here is something different......here is the deal.....lease a property for 3 years for 3 lakhs total! It has two bedrooms , hall , kitchen and bathroom with hot shower, in 500 sq metres and a 2 min walk to Palolem Beach. Here is the twist, the property has to be built , but the adavantage is that it will be built to your layout! You take possession for 3 years on completion of the build and after 3 years walk away or re-negotiate!
Sounds very interesting, that's your own Goa pad for under 8500rs per month.

Bit like a 'Time Share' but with a difference.

Take a break from your holiday!

Take a holiday from your holiday!

The Mayfair Hideaway Spa & Resort is a dream of a resort and perfect for those who have  had enough of being surrounded by hoards of people, gangs of hawkers and of course simply by those so tired through 'roughing it' in a shack on the beach needing a comfortable bed!

The Mayfair  is a beautiful resort of International standard but retaining an Indian ambiance that is so badly lacking in many of the newer Hotels. Little touches that add a very personal feel to all of the reception rooms makes  the difference and  you are immediately comforatble with your surroundings. The design and layout of the Hotel exudes quality and style and actually the smallest hint of a sense of humour! You will just have to go to understand what I mean.

The pool area is chic with the pool overlooking the beautiful estuary of the River Sal, its not surprising that this Hotel is used as the backdrop in many film productions.

Rooms are large and  comfortable with all the usual amenities and my friends that stayed there last week where totally satisfied with everything.....and he's American!

The spa area is smaller than I had expected but I suppose there's only a limited number of massage beds you can use at one time, but the ambiance as with the rest of the Hotel is perfect.

Of course, there are a couple of things I would change, but heh, I'm a Brit, we always want to change something, but I'm only refering to the large flat screen TV in the bar area, which I would quickly remove and the big seahorse....less said the better.  I believe that TVs in bars are only needed by long term married couples and couples that have just argued, get the idea?

Service is as good as anywhere, ( I chose my words carefully) and although I have been to the Mayfair many times and a known face and known never to spend more than a few rupees on a coffee or lunch, the service is as if I were spending lakhs! Very impressive.....unless of course they just feel sorry for me......

I suppose we have to discuss rates, seriously dont worry about it, incredible value for money and well below the rack rates of the International Hotels across the River. Just tell the wife its twice the amount, she will believe you , she will be impressed and happy and so will your wallet!

So that's it, The Mayfair offers everything I would need or particularly what my wife needs for a wonderful vacation, the beach is only across the river for those that want sand between there toes, but knowing the Hotel as I do, I am sure the Bikash the GM ( a really nice chap) would be able to arrange something!

Hip hip hoorah for The Mayfair!

Kid's Safari

Location: Palolem/Agonda/Patnem area
Tele: 09742232007

Child Friendly: that's what its all about!

Cost: from 250rs pp

Most people and even kids will eventually tire of the beach, but other than the beach what are the options for the younger members of your family.  I’m not talking about the 11+ year olds; I will leave the entertainment for those guys entirely up to you! I have been through that phase with my own son and still suffering from post traumatic stress, 11+ to 18 is a very testing time!!!

No, I have cast my mind back to remember what exactly worked with my son and looking back on my experiences have put together options that should keep any monster (oops!) minor, happy for at least ten minutes!

The activities can be one-offs or part of a full day but there is only one condition….. someone is there to look after them! We don’t run a crèche or kindergarten or some new exercise in penal reform, it’s an alternative to being on the beach in the Palolem / Agonda areas where you can experience a different Goa that will give you lasting memories.  

Transport will be required , if you already have transport no issues but if not we can easily arrange scooters or even an open top jeep, which should be sufficient on its own to put a smile on the face of both kids and dads!  So what do we offer?
Rock pools with fish….heh it’s a big disappointment if you go fishing, kitted out with your net and all you can catch is a plastic bottle.  Where we go I have seen pools with everything from eels, to huge crabs to octopus….no kidding!
Crabbing….and for you cynics it’s not in the same place
Kite flying…….great fun for everyone
Stream paddling….a less dangerous form of canyoning, but I do know someone who can help you with this
Feeding fish in a natural Jacuzzi
Milking cows by hand
Petting puppies and perhaps walking your own pooch for an hour

Boat trips with a difference, Pirate Adventure or Robinson Crusoe. We do not offer 'Titanic' or the   ' Poseidon Adventure' for this age group.

Treasure Hunts, Nature Trails and even Kids Cinema

Ok, so that’s what we do. We are very flexible and can offer ½ day or full day packages and we won’t take enormous groups, our prices start at just 250pp and include refreshments, 

Full day packages cost a little more and if you need transport don’t worry, we have excellent contacts with scooter hire and a jeep is at hand if that sounds more fun.

Sounds ok then give us a call or if there's something else you would like just phone and we can see what we can do.

for more info check out http://www.goabuddy.in/ 

Pranic Healing.....What the hell is that?

Location: Kailas @ Bhakti Kutir
Tele: 09823595891
Child Friendly: n/a

Cost: take it as part of an ayurvedic package

Well I know what my dad's reaction would be and although he would not ridicule it, the raised eyebrows would say it all. The rest of my family are all 'tree huggers', 'crystal owners', and general 'paranormal aficionados', so they would really be up for it! I am somewhat of a skeptic, all depends on my mood, (which reminds me , our son asked me one day how I met his mom, through the Ouija board was my reply ), anyway, today I was in the mood, so carrying my flask of holy water and 1 kg of garlic cloves I met Vijay.

Vijay explained that Pranic Healing is the balancing of energies in the body; it involves lying down, fully clothed in a darkened room with relaxing music and leaving everything up to Vijay. You close your eyes and the ‘healing’ begins. There is no physical contact, you are told to simply relax and focus on a point on your forehead, (third eye, I suppose….see I do know something!)

Lying with your eyes closed in a dimly lit room with someone ‘doing something’ around you, does feel a bit odd, but then I began to get different sensation around my body. A tingling on the arm, I initially put down to mosquitoes, but there was no sting! I then felt my feet and legs getting warmer and what I felt most strange, I consciously began to feel a change , I began to feel more positive, which wasn’t that difficult, I’d had a sh…. morning! I thought I could sense where Vijay was ‘operating’ and apart from a couple of words to check if I was comfortable, there was no conversation.

I can’t tell you how long the healing lasted; it did not seem to matter. At the end Vijay told me how he had balanced the energies in the chakras and a prognosis about both my physical and mental state, which was surprisingly accurate, bearing in mind there, is no physical contact!

If you combined this with one of Vijay’s ayurvedic massages I am sure it would be awesome, Vijay by the way has probably the best Ayurvedic Centre in the area, if not Goa! He is extremely experienced, totally in tune with what he does and with his clients and one of the nicest people I have ever met.   

Anyway, back to ‘Pranic healing’ , I am not sure if what I experienced is the norm, I know someone who I recommended to Vijay to for Ayurveda and she was totally overwhelmed by the experience , I was not overwhelmed by it but definitely affected by it. My mood had changed; I was positive, enthusiastic and even hugged a tree on the way home!    

for more info check out http://www.goabuddy.in/ Kailas Palolem

The "Magical Spice Farm".

I must have driven my friends crazy talking about this place and basically how wonderful it is! Every time I visit I get yet another insight into a different world, a different Goa, a different way of life that many believe has been lost for good and that many aspire to!

Wow, sounds interesting but why this special place is and why is it that of the countless people I have introduced to the Farm, not one has not come away dis-agreeing that what Chinmay and Gauri have is truly fantastic.

Well the truth is that The Tanshikar Working Organic Spice Farm works at all different levels, whether you are a hard fast botanist, an eco-warrior, a foodie, a historian or whatever, Tanshikar has something! I was going to say something ‘to offer’ but this suggests it’s a commercial venture in the true sense of ‘ring ring’ of the cash register; it’s simply not like that.

The farm has been running for many years, Chinmay is 4^th generation and together with his wife Gauri decided after seeing the commercial spice farms in the North, that they could do something similar but with a different emphasis. This really is a working farm, spread across 30 acres with 20 or so staff.  They live in their 220 year old family house and live a virtually self sustainable life. All of the produce is 100% organic.

So what does Tanshikar offer? Unlike the competitors, Tanshikar takes a maximum of 12 persons per day, with 6 per group being the optimum number per tour. The walk round is carried out by Chinmay or Gauri so you are sure to get personal service. The time it takes to have the ‘introduction to spices’ varies according to a number of factors and depends really upon the interest the guests have in the plants and the environment, so the tour can be anything from 30 minutes to 3 hours! I have brought people here for a quick ‘look-see’ expecting a 45 minute wait and had to wait 145 minutes!
The farm grows 6 varieties of spice and various sub varieties, you will be introduced to each spice and get a brief explanation of how they grow, what the spice can be used for etc etc.  Did you know nutmeg can be lethal?  Picking the spices or fruit to be used in your lunch adds a nice and tasty touch.

Part of the walking tour takes you to the boundary of the farm where you will find , as they put it ‘the mysterious bubble tank’, actually I think it’s just a natural spring around which a tank attached to an older temple was constructed , the tank is probably a few hundred years old . You can take a dip or dangle your feet, tiny fish come up and start to graze on the dead skin……a very different pedicure and it’s free! Don’t worry it’s not like a Spielberg movie or a clip from ‘Piranha’ , there only a few fish and to have a full pedicure would probably take six years…...Watch out for the priest, he is very hot on not wearing shoes at the tank and will soon tell you so! There is also a great photo opportunity here; they have rubbish bins, very unusual! For those wanting to trek further, Chinmay will offer trekking options to three local waterfalls, (when I say local, the nearest is 45 minute walk), so this would be perfect for those wanting to spend the whole day here and perhaps stay over.

The small shop has a selection of spices for sale, everything is produced on the farm, as well as the spices they also sell forest honey and coconut oil infused with hibiscus. The spices come ready wrapped and wherever possible in recycled paper. A small description of the spice, what it can be used for and a recipe is also provided a very nice touch that will probably ensure you use it! Attached to the shop is a tiny farm museum, probably just a dozen or so exhibits but enough to keep you interested if you are waiting for the other group to return.  Chinmay should perhaps have a quiz to see if people can determine the use of some of the objects, could be fun… 

To give guests the opportunity to enjoy the environment even more, Chinmay has constructed a number of rooms traditionally made from ‘mud’ and timber, naturally cool they have a rustic charm totally in sync with the surroundings. For all you  Brits , when we talk about ‘mud’ we mean something similar to wattle and daub, so don’t worry it won’t get washed away in a shower or you bathroom walls disappearing while taking a shower.

For those taking the tour or staying in the rooms, Gauri and Chinmay’s mom prepare fab vegetarian meals, simply delicious. I am pushing hard for Gauri to give me the recipes, (not for my wife of course, who would simply keel over from shock if I gave them to her and expected her to cook something),  I have  offered to blog them, fingers crossed and if you are a foreigner ‘knife and fork ready ‘, or Indian ‘fingers poised!’

The farmhouse for me is the highlight of Tanshikar, built just before the turn of the 19^th Century; its style is Goan not Portuguese! It has a courtyard with the obligatory Tulsi tree, mud floors and a charm that captivates, the kitchen is amazing basically it’s a ‘living museum’. Wonderful detailing in the doors and fittings make it truly memorable and loved by the whole family and ME!!

 By the way, the drive itself to the farm is breathtaking; it’s about 45 km from Palolem, just head for Neturlim.  As you drive towards  the mountain pass you will see paddy fields, waterfalls  and charming vistas, the journey is a must- do anyway, the road is excellent for biking, usually quiet with  simply  stunning scenery. Make a point of stopping and enjoying the peace and quiet and a chai! This is a different Goa.

Back to business, when you get chatting to Chinmay, you realize how focused he is on keeping things as they are; they have no intention of changing how they live or how they work. They see that opening the farm gives people an insight into their life; the farm itself is getting a lot of interest both locally and internationally and has been featured in an Austrian Travel Magazine, a Czech Style Magazine and half a page in Mid-Day Goa. A local TV series has also featured this amazing place and will be aired locally and nationally, I was interviewed as a tourist on what I think of the area! (Please send 500 rs for autographed photo sent by return post).    

So there you have it! Tanshikar Working Organic Spice Farm, a truly memorable experience. I wonder what will be the highlight of your visit; will it be the spices, the house or the warmth, gentleness and hospitality of your hosts Chinmay and Gauri?   

 

'Tanshikar' sounds magical doesn't it? Well it is!

The ‘Devica’… Experience 'On board’ Goan Hospitality

The Devica is a traditionally designed fishing boat that has been built purely to cater for people to experience Goa from a different perspective.

Devidas, the owner and Captain is the perfect host and will design your cruise to suit you. Want to party? Want to simply cruise and bird watch? Want to fish and cook the catch? Want to have a romantic dinner just for two?  Then ‘The Devica’ is moored and waiting just for you.

For the new season we are introducing the Cookery Class, this will be a totally new experience,  following a short trip to spot dolphins, the boat then returns to the calm waters of the River Sal, here the boat will moor and the classes will start. Prices will include lunch and complimentary wine /beer to complete the expereince.  

The packages can be made to suit and whether you want an hour dolphin spotting or full day cruise along the coast taking lunch on a deserted beach, it can be arranged.

Remenber 'The Devica'  is owner managed, so the prices excellent!

Our guests have always had a wonderful experience so if you want more details or to book contact Chris on 0091 8007053818.

Wooden teeth and dishwashers

Its pouring down and here I am sitting on the porch of my fisherman’s cottage and deliberating...I really like my house, or as my son calls it ‘The Hut’.  

That got me thinking, yes my roof leaks, only a bit, but yes it does leak and I have atrocious and an outrageous drainage system , I tell people I am recycling the washing up water by letting it just run into the garden, the Cannas like it, but actually its simply because the bloody thing is blocked. It’s great being ‘green’ when it saves you money, why have I left it? Well, I just know that if the plumber arrives to fix the sink, something will go wrong with the washing machine! 

There's a shock for a number of you…yes we have washing machines! And guess what we also have dishwashers both electric and two legged versions, but I digress!

But what type of accommodation would I recommend?

I have come to the conclusion that most people in the West, especially in Dudley are under the impression that we actually live in huts! I suppose my son referring to ‘the hut’ does not help, but the fact is my mother has not yet been to see me in India, perhaps that’s the reason, and she only lives a few miles from Dudley so I know…..alright!.

To be fair, the ‘shacks’ on the beach really are generally speaking  ‘shacks’ but thats the subject for another blog ......

As an alternative I have been looking at independent properties for rent in Goa, there is a whole spectrum out there, but you really do have to do your homework or go with a Company that has pre vetted the accommodation so you don’t get any nasty shocks.

Speaking honestly I have been asked to put properties on the Goa Buddy site and I am always happy to do so, but you have to be truthful in the comments. I have one house, quite pretty but there is not a single piece of furniture let alone a bed or even a hob to cook on and when asked how do they think their clients will cope they answer ‘Its ok they will bring everything with them!’ . Okay Okay Okay. So now you know why you have to do your homework, if you turn up at a beautifully restored Portuguese mansion to find you have to sleep on the floor, you might as well go into the garden and move the lawnmower over!

 I really believe that there are three categories, independent luxury, independent basic and ‘Oh my God!’ On Buddy I have some lovely properties , if they are very basic you will know but it’s all reflected in the price One thing you should consider, especially if you are staying for a long time is that proper bricks and mortar…….’hold it!’ ….’bricks and mortar?'..... Ok something more substantial than a wall made of grass and used tooth picks can be cheaper and give you more space!   You might even get a garden and a fan and a fridge and a hob and a bed and hot water! Get the idea? It’s not that I am ‘anti shack’ I just think people should be aware of the other options...

The old fisherman’s cottages are generally inexpensive, young fisherman’s cottages are about the same price, all the houses look the same anyway, my house is about 7 years old but has all of the charm of something from the 17^th Century, including a leaky roof,  all I need is wooden teeth to feel totally in character.  The preferred colour of the fishermen’s houses is ‘zinzi pink’ or ‘lycra lime’.

Newer properties, are a little more in the rental stakes and often owned by chaps working on the cruise ships, you can tell as the architectural style of all the ports he has ever visited will be reflected in the building……Greek columns, Portuguese tiles, Spanish balconies, French windows, Italian marble, German car on the drive or at least a Hyundai with a German Manufacturer ‘go faster stripes’.  Generally, these properties are well fitted and inside look like your grandmothers, crochet doylies and brown. These properties tend to be clean and spacious and offer good value; unfortunately they tend to be located away from the main tourist areas so you will probably need transport. Perhaps the Maruti 800 with Ferrari stickers can be part of the package?

That brings us to the ‘luxury independent’ category. This is the category that would shock everyone from Dudley, I have lived in India for 8 years and I know that anything that is considered ‘luxury’ in the West is available here. Goa is a rich state and the money is flowing in, with the money come the professionals and architects and interior designers to graze on the rich folk who decide to build a second home. These independent luxury properties are just that and can stand up against anything the west has to offer, whether its design, style, comfort, impact! Expensive?  Well you are not going to get 4 bedrooms, a swimming pool, chauffeur driven cars and private garden opening onto the beach for 200rs a night but when you do the math’s they work out extremely good value, plus generally if you are going on holiday you want to experience something new and perhaps something that gives you a dream rather than experience something that makes you feel sorry for your lawnmower.

Buddy has a few of these top end properties, ‘Lazydays in Goa’ have some of the best in North Goa and South Goa Villas have a small number around Palolem, both have fantastic Management Teams and don’t worry its ok to mention Dudley!   Needless to say my little house does not appear in the luxury  listing but you can stay here providing you feed the cat and bring your own wooden teeth.

Bangalore to Goa Roadtrip : Option 2 Hubli

Distance: 580km
Expected Travel Time: 9.5 hrs   Actual 12 hours
Vehicle: Maruti Jeep


The Reason:

It just had to be done; I arrived in Bangalore and just had to get the jeep back plus Patrik of course!


The Route:

The Jog Falls option was very nice but in a jeep, just so tiring, unless of course it morphed into a Mercedes overnight. So it was back to Google. The route I planned was up top Hubli and turn left, the directions seemed clear but decided to double check, the directions said come off at Bankapur, so I thought I would be clever and get the exact mileage from Yeswanthpur Station to Bankapur....good thinking eh?  

Set the alarm for 5.30 a.m. so I am able to get off at 6 and only have to drive in daylight, my usual strategy.
The Reality:

The strategy would have worked if I had not been dragged off 'kicking and shouting' to a Glenlivet Malt event at the Taj, I blame the wife, actually I blame her for everything......I missed the 5.30 alarm, woke up at 6.00 and ran round like a headless chicken for 20 minutes. Wifey, in the meantime had raised an eyelid and was complaining I had not left yet! Another 5 minutes and I think I am ready..........the other eyelid was raised but not synchronized with the left, just before you go can you make me a cup of tea and walk the dogs!!!!! 'Yes Sweetheart, of course ' is probably what I should have said....

I eventually leave at 7.15 a.m.; perfect timing to hit the traffic and realize I did not know the way to Yeswanthpur from where we lived......Tiring and annoying and decided we should have stayed in the previous apartment where I knew the way!  
The Remarks:

Within 500 metres from home:
Horrendous traffic, Patrik is already asleep amongst the jungle of foliage that we have decided would be better off in Goa plus a few more bags of stuff we never used in the UK, never used in Bangalore and unlikely to use in Goa......but you never know when they might be useful.

At least it’s warm and dry

After two or three kms:

In a dead end road near Malleshwaram. Real fun

 After an hour or so:

Finally I get on a road I recognize and join the traffic jam....

After an eternity:

I am at Yeswanthpur. 'Yippee' I cry and Patrik starts to howl!

Once on the toll road you realize how boring 600kms on your own might be. Within 15 kms I have completed my medley of Bee Gee 'hits' with the odd  "Shililtes' thrown in ( no,  they are not an radical extremist cell, ask anyone who was around in the 70's who they were...Funny to think they are probably all gone now or smell of cabbage) and I can tell Patrik is getting worried. I recognize the look, ever since I started to train him to wear a crash helmet, he has a adopted this "I don't believe it' look and I can see it now.
I ask Patrik if he has any requests, no reply.

The toll booths come and go and the scenery changes but you are driving too fast really to take in what's happening either side of the highway, unlike wifey who can drive down a road, and not only tell you who has not washed their windows but what TV Channel they are watching and still manages to drive!

I have worked out that as soon as my mileometer, or is it kilometer meter reaches 220 I have to turn left! That’s my plan!
Mmmmmmm...

At 220 exactly there is a turning to the left. This cannot possibly be it, it’s no wider than a footpath, signposted Bankapur but seriously 'rural'!!!!

'Sod it! ' There were no other junctions in sight so decided to carry on to Hubli, after a couple of km all the signs for Hubli disappeared.............then up popped 'Hubbali'....come on guys, someone knows what’s going on....is it the Bombay / Mumbai or Bangalore / Bengaluru thing kicking in?

I stopped for directions, Patrik in the meantime decides to take an interest in his surrounding and eat the palms.....boredom is terrible...I was tempted to eat the dog! Anyway the guy told me to drive 'straight-a', yes that’s right 'straight-a’, no not 'straight' but 'straight-a' and guess what? He could supply me with a guide, who decided they would rather sit with his nose against the windscreen than lean back and get eaten by Patrik...still a brave move I thought. 10 km from Hubbali, this old chap gets out, and simply points! Not a happy bunny. I decide Patrik needs a wee, I stop, Patrik just stares at me, I have a wee to show him it’s ok; he's not impressed and gets back in the jeep.

Leaving the NH after about 350km is a relief but the signposting is awful and you feel you are driving through an Industrial Park, but as you leave the outskirts of Hubli or Hubbali or wherever the scenery gets prettier and prettier and when you start to see regular signs for Karvar, it helps! The road is very pleasant especially where you start to drop down onto the coastal plain. There are lots of petrol stations on the section, so no need to worry but not a single shoe shop so I know wifey would not be impressed.

Hitting the NH17 was a great relief and I felt as if I was on home ground, the road into Karwar was quite busy and heavy rain did not help but by the time I got to Karwar the sun had come out and I picked up the fish for Rani (65 sardines for 100 bucks, not bad for a foreigner!). The border with Goa went without a hitch and decided not to stop until I reached home, if Patrik wanted to wee, then he should have gone when I told him!

I arrived at sunset, absolutely knackered, Rani and Bo were happy to see me and for the record Patrik did not wee until 7.oo a.m. the next morning! Tremendous bladder control for a 5 month puppy and when he did wee it lasted for 45 seconds.      


Summary:

Well it took longer than Google predicted, the first 350 km are mind blowingly boring and you def need company or at least a radio. After Hubli the road gets better and better and the scenery greener. Would I recommend this route, well only to those in a hurry and / or any Scorpio driver, (it will keep them off the other routes...fingers crossed)!

Goa to Bangalore Roadtrip: Option 1 'Jog' It

Distance : 600km
Expected Travel Time: 10 hours Actual 13 hours
Vehicle: Maruti Jeep


The Reason:

It just had to be done, there was simply no alternative, to bring Patrik back to Goa and get the Vespa home , I had no choice but to drive.

The Route:

Route? Well Google gave me a choice of three but  were not  particularly helpful other than giving me distance and expected travel time,  what I needed was someone to tell me , that way you don't have to think!

The answer came from a friend who gave me his jeep to use.......'go down the NH17 and turn left at Honnovar, save you at least 40 kms and drive past Jog Falls!' Ok, sorted !

Set the alarm for 5.30 a.m. so I be able to get off at 6 and only have to drive in daylight.

The Reality:

I was looking at the journey with trepidation, nearly 600km at the beginning of the monsoon, on my own, in a jeep without the usual comforts such as Power Steering , Doors, Beyonce or even Radio Mirchi.

The alarm was set but I didn't need it, the storm blowing off the sea was lifting the Mangalore tiles on my roof and dropping them back down, it was enough to wake me and question my sanity.......then I realised that if I decided not to drive, the storm raging outside would be nothing compared to the maelstrom  I would experience  via Vodafone from wifey, so decided to drive......

As I locked the door and said my last few goodbyes to Mr Rani {the cat} and Bo {the dog}, I stepped out into the horizontal rain, mmmmmm........pulled back the canvas door of my home for the journey and climbed in the jeep, 15 paces and already wet through.....wet pants and twelve hours to go!

The Remarks:

Within 500 metres from home:
The 'live' electricity cable  has blown down and swinging precariously 2 meters above the road . The jeep screeches to a halt ..... there is sufficient clearance...... just breathe in and put your flip flops on....... " Hello Sweetheart can't come because there is a live electricty cable across the road'' conversation, is simply not going to work.

still raining......

after two kms:
Get on to the NH17 and the weather brightens, a bump in the road. the Vespa lurches back and forth, I wonder will those scraggy pieces of string really hold my Vespa in place fior the next 11 hrs 50mins?
So what! The road is empty and I can see on the horizon a cloud that is less black than the rest, perhaps its going to be ok.

still raining....

after an hour or so:
The Goa / Karnataka Border is just in sight , its raining less but there are lots of Customs guys on duty and I am accutely aware that the back end of my Vespa is sticking way out,  the back door will not close  and I am without the obligatory red flag!
The Goa chappies called me through....phew......now for the Karnataka lads, I felt a bit like Steve McQueen in The Great Escape where he's on his motorcycle , jumping barricades and trying to find a gap in the border.....except my two wheeler was a Vespa and it was in the back of a jeep and it was 2011 and I was wearing a kurta rather than a leather flying jacket....and the guards weren't armed......."Stop!" The jeep screeches to a halt from a blistering 5 kms per hour, I didn't want to raise there suspicions that I had done something wrong, I really hadn't but I suppose 5 kms per hour was a bit odd....
' What's that?' "Its a Scooter....'' "Papers?'' Oh bugger I knew this would happen. So I had to park and rummage around for the Registration.......you must understand at this point that no matter what, when there is someone representing Law Enforcement around I always feel guilty! I have never done anything wrong but its just a reaction. I remember once driving in the UK and there had been a terrible accident, glass, skid marks, bits of car all over the road and this policeman was directing the traffic around the scene to allow the accident team to take the measurements, sweep up etc...I spotted him miles off, all the vehicles involved had already been towed away but as I approached, all I could see was that he was directing the traffic.....I swear to this day that he must have changed his action. just for a split second and so I followed his directions and stopped , smack in the middle of the accident scene surrounded by bits of wreckage and glass and  very bemused policemen in bright yellow jackets. I wound my window down "What did I do?  I wasn't speeding Officer honest!' ...'No sir, but you may have destroyed vital clues in how the accident happend.....' "Oh, sorry......shall I go then ?'
Back to Goa....With beads of sweat running down my brow...actually that's not right, it was rain running down my brow I take the paperwork over to the boss, I know he's the boss,  he has  bigger badges and a bigger belly. He takes the log book, 'Model?' " Its a '62, I'm taking it home to Mysore". Big smile from Big Daddy, the babies coming home "Off you go!" I nonchalantly run back to the car, throw my document wallet, behind the seat and drive off at a thundering 20 kms per !

Still raining......

After an hour or so....

Still raining......

I drive on over the River at Karwar, very pretty with views out to sea and a sand bar reaching north across the estuary. Drive on past The Udipi Restaurant where the food is cheap and more than acceptable if you are on your own but today I have to keep going. The road is still quiet and its too early to eat anyway, but must make a mental note to stop off at Karwar on the way back to pick up some fish for the cat, it's where you get the freshest of fish at exceptional prices and where all the local shack owners (south of Agonda) come if they are that interested in picking up the best quality sea food for their guests!

Following the road, its a shame I cant stop and really study the coastline, its quite dramatic  and I am sure it would be worth exploring the area more...so much to do ......

I have been travelling for some time now and decide that my friends advice to take some one along to keep me company would have been a good idea....

Mmmmmmm...

A few miutes later there's a chap, well dressed, office type struggling with his umbrella and getting very wet, as I pass he looks up. I know in Europe there is no way I would give anyone a lift but this is India, its 7 a.m. , there cant be any nutters around can there?
'Udipi?' asks the guy, "well in that direction to start with." He gets in, its then I realise the only two words he speaks are 'Udipi' and 'No'....so....... 'You ok? ', "No', 'I'll drop you off at Hanovaar?', 'Udipi'.....anyway he was ok we had a fairly  one sided conversation  but eventually got the knack of just asking the right question...."You aren't english then? ' 'No' ..."Enjoy Shakespeare' 'No'!  Anyway it passed af few minutes and then I dropped him off at my junction.

After two hours or so...

Still raining...

Thr road off the NH17, signposted 'Bangalore' was wide and winding and almost immediately starts to climb up into the Ghats. Fast and smooth and was a very pleasant surprise, the landskape is very pretty and as you climb it gets better and better, before long you are in the clouds..the rain clouds.....very dramatic and wet. The road unforunately is also wet and as you get higher it become narrower and less well kept. When dry and sunny I expect this to be a beautiful drive but still having wet pants and more than 350kms to go it was still a bit duanting!

One memorable  sight was a large lady, just off the bus, carring a huge bag and crossing the road, the rain was bucketing and then I suddenly noticed there was a cat crossing the road with her and actually sheltering under the bag.....what a clever and dry pussy!

There's only one 'T' junction that needed signposts but there's a couple of shops. (Come on what would you expect a T junction has 2 corners!)  and very friendly people in uniform, all happy to point me in the right direction........

After what seems to be forever you start to approach the junction for Jog Falls, I decided to turn right over a bridge, WRONG..this led to Jog Falls which actually is well worth a stop and stay over...but that's for another time. Back over the bridge, you see the water vapour /spray hanging over the falls, quite amazing  and I promised myself to go back.

Back on the main road, which between the NH17 and Shimoga which up until now has actually drops down to single track and possibly just large footpath in width in places, starts to descend and suddenly the rain stops! Hoorah! The road quality also gets better Hoorah! and then I realise its taken me nearly 5 hours to  there! The 'less than 10hr' Google prophecy is simply not going to happen.

Dry and warm ......

The road becomes quite fast and the signs for Tumkur and Shimoga come quick and fast. The landscape has now changed , the terrain is flat with dramatic mountain ranges and outcrops 'outcropping' on regulat basis. 50 kms or so from Shimoga there is a signpost for Bangalore and Shimoga and its simply did not make sense, so bear this is mind, I had no choice but ask someone.

Suddenly as I am talking to a chap on the right, someone flashes a police id card in front of me! OK here we go, the civilian then asks where am I heading and the next minute he is in the seat beside me . Well, he had a police id so off we go, it turns out he is a 'finger print expert'.....very odd.....in the middle of nowhere I am sitting next to a 'finger print expert'?  Be calm. he looks innocent but no ink stains mmmm? But has a 'Peewee Herman' voice  and a 'Mrs Doyle' laugh and I kept waiting for the question "Cup of Tea? '.
It didn't happen  and as we approached Shimoga I was expecting a request to stop to drop him off, no my new friend had decided to stay with me a bit longer....oh! oh!

No need to worry, I just kept waving at people so that if the cops came looking for my body everyone will be able to say "Yes, he gave us a wave , but looked a bit worried! They went in that direction."

My new aquaitance then suggested lunch, very civilised and we stopped at the Swetha Delux restaurant in Tarikere, its a veg restaurant but serves the most wonderful masala dosa, the best I have had in India! Make it a must-do, if you decide to take this route. The owner is Prakash Chandra Hegde 0826 422362. Excellent!

So on we travel eventually reaching Assikere, 180 km or so from Bangalore and where I dropped off my guest.

The road then on has surprising sights, I was astounded by herds literally herds of ponies, all brown, which really baffles me..why is everything brown , loads of donkeys, all smaller than my dog but I am sure they were donkeys.....missed photo opportunity I think and lots of women wearing what seemed to be early 80's Christian La Croix.

The road was actually a bit boring from then on and once you hit the NH it is very boring but you know you are nearly home. Just one word of warning, if you are not careful the road on to the NH actually turns out to be the slip road off the NH for traffic heading South, so be careful and when you go under the NH at Tumkur be sure to turn right!

Not alot to say really about  National Highway driving, anyway you soon arrive  in Bangalore, you    know  simply because you are in a traffic jam, but it is inevitable you will hit traffic if you want to drive from Goa in daylight.

Summary:

Well it took over 13 hours, but the scenery is spectacular and there are lots of small towns and villages and everyone had a smile, there are a few crazy Scorpio drivers but they get everywhere .
So if you  have  the time and want to make the road trip part of the experience, I would really recommend the 'Jog Falls' route.  Ideally a nice open top mercedes would make it perfect but I  was more than happy in my Maruti.....even in the rain.

100 bucks- dinner with a beer!

There are some fabulous restaurants in Goa and restaurants for every budget, here’s an opportunity to highlight the lesser known places, who either can’t afford to advertise or simply don’t want to!

The only criteria is that it falls into the ‘100 bucks or less’ bracket, ideally it’s for excellent food but maybe it’s the ambiance or whatever…you tell me!

'Sex and drugs and rock & roll'.....I really dont think so.....

A few months ago some friends asked me if I knew about a  Monastery here in South Goa, I presumed immediately, as my friends are 'foreigners' that the only reason they would be on a quest to find such a place was because either the monks produced some of the finest cheese in India made from milk from the offspring of a pygmy buffalo and a dachshund, or produced some alcoholic beverage that would be amusing when served with their amuse bouche.
Making a mental note that it probably related to something  being force fed.......I informed my friends that in Canacona we have a Mutt but not a Monastery and then distracted them with directions to a local restaurant where they could savor fresh oysters and a bottle of chilled Kingfisher [2011 vintage]. The Mutt and the Monastery were quickly forgotten…….
Then a few days ago I was driving on the NH 17, perplexed by the oncoming vehicle’s trajectory from a notorious bend was sending it straight for me and that the rear of lorry seemed to coming at a faster rate of knots than the front!……another story……I digress………think Rhombus or in this case the‘ Margao to Karwar Express’ …….I pulled over to the verge and stopped!
I shook my head and looked up to the heavens and there it was a sign!  ‘Carmelites’…..it was not a poster for a 70’s style quartet group, although that’s not a bad business idea for Goa….make mental note.., no, the sign was for their ‘Crib’! Oops bad choice of M TV phrase.
I must admit I was intrigued so decided to take a look….. very nice ……nice gardens…..no one around……very very quiet….perhaps they are just doing ‘Monk-ey’ things..Oops that does not sound right…. so should I just walk in and shout ‘Hi’ and ‘Where’s the cheese?’
Decided that was not the thing to do, I have seen Robin Hood where Friar Tuck continually beats the crap out of people….innocent people I might add, just doing a job to pay the mortgage, send the kids to school and pay the next installment on their new wheel and work out why the wife wants Jimmy Choo shoes, she lives in 16^th Century Nottingham, for Humpty's sake!
So I walk in…..fantastic atmosphere….calm…..peaceful……but no people.  I felt awkward….’How do you do?’ A really normal chap appeared , when I say ‘appeared’ I don’t  mean in a’ Biblical’, ‘Chris Cross’ sort of a way, he just opened the door…….
‘Hi I am Chris and I don’t know why I am here!’ I still can’t believe I said that!

Anyway, basically it’s like a ‘Prayer Centre’, it’s in a lovely location and you can stay but it has to be arranged by your local diocese. The ‘Carmelite’ I met was a really nice guy, I had never met one before!…No brown shroud……no baldy bit…..nothing like Father Ted or Father Jack or the Vicar of Dibley ……had a new Activa and jeans! Very impressive……


So no ‘cheese and wine party’ this time,  just a reminder to me about how diverse and wonderfully entertaining Goa can be, a magnet for mind, body, soul and those wanting a suntan!   

The South Goan Firang

Its 2011 in Europe and the West and actually the same in India, but you wouldn’t necessarily think so if you looked at the firangs walking around Palolem last season.

Palolem is not ‘atypical’ of any particular beach in South Goa but demonstrates my theory that there’s something very strange happening on the flights bound for India.

Every firang is affected by it, whether it’s their behavior or style of dress with the male firang definitely affected more so.

Let’s just take a look:

The female firang is a different shape to the Indian lady, usually larger, much larger but thankfully they have listened to what the tour operator has said and generally wear far more in terms of material and placement of said ‘material’ than they would if they were in the South of France. Agonda is not Antibes!  So taking that into,  consider four ‘nipple covers’ bouncing down the beach one day in Palolem last season did cause quite a stir, literally I believe with some of the locals. This was an odd occurrence but there was also the instance of the large Russian lady wearing a ‘see through’ top and a thong, she was spotted in an aisle in the local supermarket! Luckily the locals just thought a consignment of pillows had been delivered and were waiting to be untied!

But it’s the male firang that has sparked my personal ramblings! But where to start? I have several theories:

Firstly, back to the ‘something in the air’ at thirty thousand feet!’  I am sure they must spray something into the air that removes some of the usual elements of the International jet setting western male.

My second theory is that by some unexplained phenomenon they receive regression therapy on the flight and find themselves trapped in 1967…..

Or , my last theory, they are so far away from home they can really dress as they like without the repercussions of getting beaten up by the lads down the local pub for wearing a pair of ‘jazzy pant’, (basically  ‘ali baba’ style trousers].

As a result of one or all of my theories being correct it’s potentially a horrendous site. The local Goan guys wear jeans,‘t’ shirts and ‘flip flops’, with designer labels: the firangs, on the other hand, wear simply anything, the baggier and more colorful the better. The good thing about this is that it’s brought the generations together, grandson, dad and granddad all wearing similar outfits.

……….and what about ‘hair’? Have I really been away from England that long? It looks like half of the barbers have closed and those remaining only know how to shave heads, so those who decide not to shave their heads invariably decide to grow their hair and inevitably get dread locks! That’s ok but when you see fifty year old white guys with dreadlocks down to their bottom,  it does make you think , and think even more when you see other firangs have gone for the ‘Amy Winehouse’ look and piled them on top of their head! 

So in Goa its official  its either the flouncy ‘flop’ look or the shaved head, the ‘shaved head’ gives you permission to get as many tattoos as you want, these guys probably tried to go for dreads but because they were follicley challenged, failed and are now trying to  find another canvas to demonstrate their individuality!

Talking about “Tattoos’ , my God this is not a fashion amongst the firangs it’s a disease…….If anyone is interested in earning a fortune, learn the art of skin grafting because there are going to be so many people wanting to remove their ‘art’ you won’t believe, you could even charter flights and bring them over here….. And then you could put something in the air supply to make them desire rhino plaster surgery….oops I digress but a great way to make money!


Ok, so back to where we were, although they are now all wearing ‘floaty numbers’ they then decide they need to get some wheels! There’s the practical Honda Activa and the new “electric’ scooter which is very popular with the firangs that have ‘found themselves’. There is also the Royal Enfield Bullet, which brings out the “Clint Eastwood’  for those who are not looking for themselves! They hire the ‘Bullet’ and suddenly they need to look the part…….’Clint Eastwood’ would not wear a beanie hat and jazzy pants, so they compromise. Fortunately , the Goans have seized the opportunity and are happy to sell you a real ‘Clint Eastwood’ style cowboy hat, dashing! Unfortunately the firangs  are usually reluctant to give up the jazzy pants and with their new found persona like to ride round bare chested, not a good look when you are thirty pounds overweight and haven’t hit the gym since College! Also someone needs to tell them that tying your cowboy hat on to your head can also spoil the image and that when you ride along, the front of the hat folds back so they look more like Mary Poppins than Steve McQueen..    

….and before I forget! The older firang in India , feels the sun on his back and  reminisces about the glorious summer of 1972.In those days, everyone wore speedos, tiny swimming briefs which were the fashion for anyone under 75kg. Unfortunately, these guys have now grown up and grown in kg, as a result although the temp is the same as the seventies, their girth isn’t and the sight of fifty + year olds wearing speedos and in some cases ‘thongs’ is enough to scare anyone!

This takes me very nicely to the ‘sarong’, as wore by the male firang. Imagine, a fifty + guy, nostalgic for the seventies and his speedos  is now feeling very trendy, he’s back on form and ready to impress the ladies! He’s seen in the papers that David Beckham wears a sarong on holiday….so what’s David Beckham got that he  hasn’t?  So without any second thought, off he goes and buys a sarong, he will wear it  over the thong , very useful when  it’s time to go to the bathroom, which at fifty is quite regular!  Unfortunately when David Beckham wears the sarong, he has designers and assistants handy to make sure the ‘sarong’ sits perfectly, our fifty year old firang wears it just under his chest , deliberately  so it catches the sweat under his ‘man boobs’, he thinks its discreet….    

what do flying fish, Gregory Peck, Captain Pugwash and 'tastes like chicken' have in common?

 I go for a walk along the beach, its a beauiful day, the tourists have gone and its just me and the surf .  I decide to go round the headland to the next beach. No big deal but then I spot something washed up against the rocks........it looks like a seal, far to big for your average fish,  so I investigate along with three beach dogs who are equally inquisitive.
But its not a seal, it's a baby whale a metre plus in length long!  Even the dogs cant believe it! So what can I do?  I know I will phone wifey.......Why? No idea but seemed the right thing to do and as long as she did not recommend mouth to mouth I am ok.'
'Are you sure its a whale?' , 'Of course I am! ' . 'I have seen lots of National Geographic so I do recognise a whale.....I know my fish!'
The really odd thing it had not been 'Gregory'd' in any way, [as in Gregory Peck- perhaps its before your time], no marks nothing very odd, so what to do....nothing I carry on.

At the other end of the beach I meet a weathered fisherman and we get talking about the 'beastie', he tries to tell me its a dolphin but I know my fish!  He calls over one of his crew, asks if it smells and I ask if he means the whale or his chappie and as i say 'Neither but one may be turning...' off we go back to the scene. He is very keen and walks ahead and I notice how he walks, think he may be 'Rodger the Cabin Boy' as in Captain Pugwash but decide not to think about it.....best not to......

We arrive at the rocks, he proceeds to prod the corpse, sniffs the air and then finally tries to pick it up by the tail, it really is  4 feet tall, with a bulbous head and horizontal tail, its a whale!!!!!
'Its a flying fish!' cries the fisherman. There is no way this thing could be a flying fish , flying fish are streamlined and sleek , this thing  might have been able to come to the surface and 'flop over, very dramatic  but no way could it be said to be flying!

Then it dawns on me why there is so much interest, it does not smell and it looks as if its just been caught.....oh my god.....its tandoor time or perhaps the making of a very large pot of fish curry rice . Bet it tastes of chicken!

So 'Wee Willy' is no more. R.I.P.

Driving in Goa & India PART ONE

Before I start  I need to say that India has some of the best drivers in the world.....they have to be......and for all you professional drivers, please put your eyes back on the road.
 

Lesson 1: 'Right of way'

• 2 wheel drivers have 'right of way'.
• 4 wheel drivers also think they have 'right of way'.
• Bicycles, commercial vehicles, buses, even the lady in our road pushing a vegetable cart and my wife also thinks they have 'right of way'.

Lesson 2: 'Indicators' and 'Lights' 

Indicating left: can mean 

• I am about to turn left , I am turning left and nothing will stop me, I have turned left, I have turned left and forgot to cancel it.
• I have seen you and I am slowing down to let you pass......please note this is rarely the reason 
• 'What does this 'stick' do?
• 'I love my new car, just look at this!'

Indicating right: can mean 

• I am about to turn right, I am turning right and nothing will stop me, I have turned right, I have turned right but forgot to cancel it.
• 'What does this 'stick' do?
• 'I love my new car, just look at this!'
• I have seen you and I am happy to let you overtake.
• I have seen you and I have also seen the car rapidly approaching on the other side of the road but you are really pissing me off, I m happy to let you overtake.
• I have seen you and I have also seen the car  rapidly approaching on the other side of the road but if you are ok at driving you will probably manage to squeeze through. I am happy to let you overtake.

Hazzard Lights: can mean

• 'What does this 'button'do?
• 'I love my new car, just look at this!'
• Its DIWALI

Headlights: can be useful.

Lesson 3: Reversing {FOR LADIES ONLY}

• What' that? Oh no I dont do reversing, I have someone that does that for me

Lesson 4: Maintainance of your vehicle

• Tyres: Unfortunately when you buy your vehicle you will find the tyres have tread. This is useful for stopping but means you get less kms to the litre. Bald tyres have less friction with the road surface and so you can save money! Be frugal, silky smooth will save you loads of paise.
• Brakes: Ugh?

Lesson 5: Driving in severe weather conditions including drizzle and bright sunshine.

• Get home as soon as you can. Dont slow down for anything remember you have the right of way. The roads are dangerous when its raining.

 Lesson 6: Accidents 

• Remember its not your fault!
• Play to the crowd, better acting bigger crowd
• Make sure you do not move your vehicle as it may cause an obstruction to pedestrians
• Have all documents ready...wink wink
• Ensure you phone home and the office, you will be some time...........
• Hit a pedestrian......what pedestrian?  Hit a Maruti.......well just shout alot! Hit a Omni van with 20 people inside ....sorry you are on your own! Hit a Mercedes......sorry you are on your own! Hit a foreigner....JACKPOT!

to be continued......

not about goa..... just a rambling........

My wife is always accusing me of losing things, keys, mobile, wallet. She is now telling me that I have lost my bottom......apparently when we got married I had a very nice bottom and now it has gone.. apparently I have lost it!
I have tried to recall where the incident may have happened but I dont think I could bring myself into filling out a MBR 'Missing Buttock Report' or an insurance claim form, I know BUPA are good but that good?  
So if you see two cute buttocks lying around without a body they are probably mine.                         Obviously there is a reward but only if I get the matching pair, otherwise I will have to keep standing in profile.......

To bus or not to bus? The Goa commute.

Now living in India and splitting my time between Bangalore and Goa, travelling between the two can be a real pain. Originally I would take the bus or car to the airport and then a quick hop on the plane followed by another bus or car. However, what was taking just a couple of hours a few years back is now taking longer and longer and costing more and more.

Considering the possible 2 hours it takes to get to the airport; the delays; the ‘final call’ announcements….usually for my wife who is shopping; the flight itself; baggage reclaim and the transfer to South Goa:  the travel time from door to door is actually more than 6 hours. Given that the flight timings are usually early to mid afternoon, the day is lost! If you are only going for a weekend, what a waste of your valuable R & R.

But what are the options: self drive, train or bus. Mmmmmmmm………..Give me time to think about that one……………

Do I really want to drive for 12 hours and then find that because I have a car I become the designated driver,  tour guide, taxi, ‘drop off at the shops wallah’, hero when some total stranger needs a chemist or handy alternative for getting the landlord’s old and smelly cat to the vet? I don’t think so! Also add to the fact that by the time you have got back to Bangalore you will have so much Goan sand in the foot wells of the car that you could be accused of causing major beach erosion…. Ok, so is ‘self drive’ viable? No, not unless you are an insomniac who has a penchant for cleaning sand out of your car and being the ‘Good Samaritan’.

So that brings us to the ‘train’, lots of plus points, it’s cheaper, it travels overnight and so feasibly you can sleep and there is a toilet! Hoorah for trains! Hip hip hoorah! This probably gets the vote by most women but I really feel uncomfortable sitting in a carriage with the windows painted black, you might as well be in a submarine, so if you are claustrophobic I would not recommend this option, unless you don’t mind sitting on the floor between the carriages next to the toilet…..lovely.

Bus travel is currently my favourite. Now a seasoned ‘bus jockey’, I find it convenient, it travels overnight, I get dropped off just 2 kms from my home in Goa and its cheap! My last ticket, Bangalore to Goa on a non a/sleeper bus was just 500 rupees! Yes 500 rupees!!!!  Ok, I admit there are disadvantages:

·         the bus has broken down twice, the first instance it was 6 hours into the journey and I had to travel the rest of the way by local bus. In the second instance, the bus would not start after a ‘comfort stop’, very interesting…. 15 people jump starting a bus by pushing it uphill! I might add I did not assist, because of my bad back, it’s always useful to have a bad back, but I did not feel guilty at all because the other 20 passengers just sat on the bus!

·         Having ‘Bob Marley live in Concert’ for 6 hours could also be seen as a problem.

·          Smelly feet, other people’s, I may add, could be an issue but there is no need to worry about snoring, the roar of the engines and the frequent squeal of brakes drowns out any usual ‘night noises’.  Less said the better….

·         Toilet stops are an obvious problem, particularly for the ladies, but I am yet to experience anything too unpleasant from my fellow travelers.

So what tips can I give to a ‘bus virgin’? Well:

·         always take a sleeper not a semi sleeper 

·         always be friendly to the driver, just in case of emergency stops!

·         don’t expect 5 star toilets, just don’t have expectations then you will be fine, just be happy it’s a toilet!

·        always take a top bunk……too many shoes in the aisle! Phew!!!

·         don’t be shocked if you think the fellow passenger next to you has passed away, some people sleep very soundly……ref: .Seabird Bangalore to Goa 26^th march

·         think of your journey as an adventure….it will be

·         don’t argue with anyone sitting down, you don’t know how big they are till they stand up and fill the aisle 

·         make sure you book the type of ticket you want, don’t presume that when you walk into the agency on your own they will automatically give you a single bunk! You might end up sharing with someone you think may have died, who has smelly feet and is the size of buffalo, and has trance music blaring away on a very poor quality ghetto blaster! Yes they still have ghetto blasters here… 

·         finally, don’t worry about herpes. I heard someone caught herpes in one of the buses, I am not sure what they were doing but I have never seen a single herp!

Hope this helps, I now travel practically weekly by bus and although I would not recommend it to everyone…..names supplied on request, it really is a great way to get around India, especially if you are on a budget or a tight schedule and use overnight travel as cost effective and good use of time.

….and do I arrive feeling bright and breezy? Well to be honest no, but a quick shower a bite to eat and a quick check of the luggage for any stray herps and you are ready to hit the beach, the bar, the shops or your travel agent for booking that double berth!  

FYI I always use  SEABIRD TOURISTIC

Walking in the Rain

This is probably not in line with blogging etiquette , but I just came across this and thought it has to be worth sharing,  I hope you agree....

'It was a busy morning, about 8:30 , when an elderly
gentleman in his 80s arrived to have stitches removed from his
thumb. He said he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00
am .
I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would
be over an hour before someone would to able to see him. I saw
him looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with
another patient, I would evaluate his wound. On exam, it was well
healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed
supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.
While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another
doctor's  appointment this
morning, as he was in such a hurry.
The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home
to eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health.
He told me that she had been there
for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer's Disease.
As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late.
He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not
recognized him in five years now.
I was surprised, and asked him, 'And you still go every morning,
even though she doesn't know who you are?'
He smiled
as he patted my hand and said,
'She doesn't know me, 
but I still know who she is.'
I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm,
and thought,
'That is the kind of love
I want in my life.'
True love is neither
physical, nor romantic.
True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and
will not be.
With all the jokes and fun that are in e-mails, sometimes there
is one that comes along that has an important message. This one I
thought
I could share with you.

The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything;
they just make the best
of everything they have. 
I hope you share this with someone you care about.
I just did. 
'Life isn't about how to survive the storm,
but how to dance in the rain.

Activities in Goa

I believed like most people that basically, other than the tour of a  'Spice Farm' and perhaps 'washing an elephant!' there was nothing to do in Goa other than beach, sun , sand and lots of alcohol.
Then one evening a friend told me about  a conversation she had had where people were saying they were bored! That sent me on a personal quest, I decided to become a Don Quixote for 'Activities in Goa', actually its more like 'a man on a donkey' rather than the whole cavalry bit there it goes....
So in my research to date I am amazed to say that there are simply hundreds of things to do other than sit on the beach or in a bar, some perhaps a little sedentry, some a little dangerous but believe me they are there, so as one Company in Bangalore says it 'Get of your ass!' and get to experience a different Goa.
If you know of any activities you can recommend I would be really pleased to know about them and we will spread the word.....
For the record, how about "graphic design workshops', 'Indian Cookery Classes on board a traditional fishing boat', 'weaving' or even attanding a 'shushi school'! 

A lost morning in France, wait for the Goa version

The Lost Morning.Ok, I’m on holiday with the family in the South of France, its early in the season and no one around, Laila wants to do some jobs around the house and Max wants to be with his mates.
FANATASTIC, I have 4 hours to do what I want, and do what I’m good at: sunbathing on the beach!
I have to go by bicycle as Laila may need the car, no problem it’s only 5 km or so, plenty of time to get some peace and solitude and a tan!
As quick as I can, I collect the necessaries and off I pedal, the Beach is calling me.
It’s mid morning and it’s already getting hot, I take the track off the road and pedal through the undergrowth to my spot! My personal bit of beach, its perfect, not a sole around, just me, the sun and the blue Mediterranean.
In a flash my towel is out, the sun cream on and I’m in the crucifix position, perfect to get the even tan.

I can feel the beads of sweat on my forehead and I can hear the waves gently hitting the beach, but hang on there’s something not right,  can hear a sort of dragging/brushing noise, it’s very quiet but I can definitely hear it and its getting closer and closer.
I have to open my eyes, I look to the left and nothing, I look to the right and nothing, there’s no choice I can’t lie there any longer , so my wonderful 5 minutes was coming to an end. Sitting up I could see nothing different to when I lay down, golden sand, blue sea , blue sky and ‘hang on’ in the peripherary of my vision I can see something sort of grayish white in colour , the size of a small dog perhaps. I slowly turn to my left and three feet away from where I was lying stood a seagull!
Now I don’t normally like seagulls but I’m not going to shoo it off or throw anything at it, after all I’m a sucker for animals…….then I see it has a problem……possibly a broken wing! Bugger. Bugger. Bugger.
The South of France must have hundreds of km of beach and even this time of the season thousands and thousands of people so why oh why did this bird decide to come to me for help! Bugger. Bugger. Bugger.
OK, so I’m 5 km from the car, if it’s still there, I’m 25 km to the nearest Vet. I have a small rucksack. It looks hungry. It looks too big for the rucksack and what happens if someone suddenly appears on the beach to find an Englishman trying to stuff a live seagull into his beach bag. Not looking too good is it.
So I sit down and try to think.
It has def singled me out and is basically now standing on the towel holding out its damaged wing, you see if it had been a Disney film I would have known what to do and made a splint out of a…you know what I mean….but Walt wasn’t around …….
I checked my bag, all I had was an orange, and it looked hungry, hungry enough to eat an orange? No! Of course a seagull is not going to eat an orange it’s a carnivore!
Time is pressing and its getting hotter and hotter and I can already see my carefree ‘time on my own’ disappearing.
Then I have an idea, the first thing s to make sure it’s fed after that I’ll sort out the vet. I know there’s a shop on the main road, just a few km from the track. I’ll get it some food.
I didn’t even consider the thing would walk off, I just packed up as quickly as I could and jumped on the cycle and off I pedaled as fast as one can in thirty three degrees of heat. Sweating and smelling like some wild thing, I got to the shop, then the question. What should I buy? There isn’t a big demand for seagull food, whether it’s canned or fresh so surprisingly the French shopkeeper with no English whatsoever just thought I was a total looney trying to explain I wanted to buy food for a seagull. Anyway, I decided ‘dog food’ , unfortunately my French is limited and all I could think of was the word for dog ‘chien’ and the word for meat, which  I forget but think it’s ‘carne’ or viande’, it doesn’t matter because then the shopkeeper thought I wanted to buy dog meat i.e. meat from a dog rather than for a dog! He didn’t sell either so in the end I settled upon two large tins of braising steak in jelly or something….and a bottle of water for me.
I am now carrying all this extra stuff on an old heavy bike and thinking it’s too hot, I’m going to die and how will Laila take it that I was carrying two large tins of steak in my bag when I have been a vegetarian for thirty years, a closet carnivore!
I eventually get back to my little patch of, what was heaven’ and is now becoming my personal little patch of hell. Then I realize that the bloody bird has probably walked off, trying to find a better ‘good Samaritan’ than
the stupid Englishman that fed me orange!    
But needn’t have worried, I didn’t even have time to put my towel down and it re appeared. I was now feeling rather smug, Laila would be so proud of me and then I realized I didn’t have a tin opener.  Bugger. Bugger. Bugger.

The seagull just looked at me then the can of braising steak, I could tell it was famished, it would probably eat both tins and then want more. This could be an expensive rescue…..
After what seemed like hours and yet still wasn’t mid day, I managed to smash open the can, the jelly flew everywhere, and I was covered in this horrendous goo, a vegetarian with a marrow bone face pack…awful. With a little more prizing, I managed to get the steak out of the tin , collected it all on a piece of paper and happily presented it to the seagull , who had patiently been waiting and wondering what exactly the mad Englishman was doing.
I placed the food in front of the bird, it stared at the steak and stared at me, it hobbled forward dragging its injured wing. Thank God it was going to be ok, at least it was feeding…… but no. It looked as if it almost sniffed the meat, looked at me, looked at the meat, looked back at me with I swear a look of total disgust in its eye and turned round, dragging its wing. It looked back once more, me standing there like the maitre de of some Michelin restaurant which had just been de starred. And then it happened….it flew off!

My morning had been a complete waste, a few people had started to appear on the beach and settle themselves down for a relaxing afternoon.

I was just sitting there with a pile of steak and jelly next to me, not surprisingly no one came near. I decided to throw the food into the sea, disaster me standing in the sea surrounded by brown floating jelly and gravy and lumps of steak, really not a pleasant site and passing tourists were not impressed.

I quickly left the water and retreated to the security of my towel. I just want to go home now, embarrassed at being so foolish and not having to explain why I had a large tin of braising steak in my bag, I decided I could not take it home, I knew what the answer was, and I would bury it. All the evidence of my three hour disaster would be gone, so dug a hole and dropped it in. God knows what the people on the beach thought but by that time I didn’t care. The mercury n the thermometer was climbing fast and I was wilting faster so I packed up and went home again.

I had probably lost about 4 kilos in weight by the time I got back home. ‘You’re red, too much sun eh?’ “Not exactly’ was my reply and I decided to come clean, just in case I had been seen buying steak or standing in gravy.

Highly amusing, totally ridiculous where running through Laila’s mind and then she asked about the second can of steak. “I buried it!’ I replied ‘No let’s just forget about the whole thing!’

Nice idea and then she pointed out that I had buried a can of meat on a beach in the direct sun, where the temperatures would reach the low forties, had I thought about the possibility that it might explode. Bugger bugger bugger …and what if there was an innocent couple sun bathing, they could be physically harmed or mentally scarred and not be able to eat ‘viande sur la plage’ again!     

There was no choice, I had to go back…..

The beach was rather full now, a few people recognized the mad chap from the morning and they weren’t a bit surprised when I stated to dig holes, trying to find something in the sand , you hoped you would never see again can be hard.. The new comers on the beach  were even more surprised when I found it.

I tried to be as nonchalant as possible, as if this was very normal behavior but I was happy to go and make muy escape but guess what? I spotted the seagull again! Sidling up to an unsuspecting sun bather, I  just wonder even now, what it was after,  obviously a gourmet,
   the little Bugger Bugger Bugger